Cecilia Xuetong Feng – windy windy (and windy) days
(to be updated)
To you
Dear gaze that I do not know if I might come across you one day
Here I am writing to you.
It’s intriguing to think of gaze as a body part.
What do I move
When I move my gaze
Eyeball, muscle, skull, head, or actually my leg and foot
Can it be that my gaze is rooted in the ground
That I am the eyes of the earth
Do you see
three and half lost games of emancipation between chaos and handshakes (and the other similar three and half ones to come)
flickering gold under cold water move my gaze as a part of the body and bodies moved by the gaze
putting a flower in a broken vase that we fixed yesterday
I tend to naturally write the verbs in the form of -ing. Probably the simplest form for a non-mother tongue speaker.
Although it is indeed tempting to think of an action as ongoing
a state, an atmosphere, and a sudden emergence without necessarily an origin and afterwards
almost a self-indulging childlike naitivity
and yet are there other ways to express that specific texture with words and without the inherent linguistic delays?
There is the neccesity for a system of notation.
a pratical way to avoid the usual latency and lack of ambiguity of language while falling into another loop hole of language.
(I often notice my self-criticism some sentences later burst into a delayed kafkaesk smile)
I often imagine langauge to be this clumsy giant with even larger leather boots trying to chase after a tiny sensation or a fragment of thought
that first tries to capture it into a gigantic net of meanings with holes and loose threads
and then hold onto an almost broken thread to create a public meaning
mirror(ing) as a concept
and a verb. (a coincidential hommage on Meredith Monk’s shadow)
comparison and context that create meanings